


A Love More Precious Than Any Gem

by Zakani_Donovan



Series: Well, That Was A Thing (Good Omens One-Shots) [32]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angel Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens), Demon Aziraphale (Good Omens), F/F, Fluff, Gay, Happy Ending, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Ineffable Spouses, Ineffable Wives | Female Aziraphale/Female Crowley (Good Omens), Lesbian, Light Angst, Protective Aziraphale (Good Omens), Reverse Omens, Warlock is the Antichrist, good omens - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-17 03:41:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29343735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zakani_Donovan/pseuds/Zakani_Donovan
Summary: Azirafell is a demon who cons people out of their hard-earned money by selling them fake jewelry in her free time. Crowley is an angel who likes to volunteer in her free time, whenever she's not out performing miracles. Her usual spot to volunteer at just happens to be next door to Azirafell's jewelry store. Their secret arrangement will certainly come in handy once they learn the end is nigh.
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale & Harriet Dowling, Aziraphale & Thaddeus J. Dowling, Aziraphale & Warlock Dowling, Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Crowley & Harriet Dowling, Crowley & Warlock Dowling
Series: Well, That Was A Thing (Good Omens One-Shots) [32]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1800655
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	A Love More Precious Than Any Gem

**Author's Note:**

> Context: My first proper reverse AU. And let's make it an ineffable wives AU, for good measure. Also, if the characters don't seem like their canon selves, that's intentional.

"Oh, this one looks lovely. What do you think, Anathema?" Asked the young man, who seemed to like the gaudy, ruby ring the blonde demon was showing off. As far as he knew, all the accessories that Ms. A. Zira Fell was showing off were genuine and **not** made out of glass, plastics and/or metal. Though, he would never find out about that, because her demonic miracles would ensure they'd never break.

And it's not like she looked like a con-artist to begin with. Azirafell was a chubby, pale, woman-shaped being. Average height when wearing high heels (which she'd wear to bed if they let her), kind blue eyes (contact lenses to conceal her true eyes) and she dressed like a typical 1950's housewife (but in dark colors). The only 'iffy' thing about her was the small tattoo on her right cheek. It was a black silhouette of a gargoyle gecko, her animal form. However, people didn't usually see it, because a few loose strands of blonde curls would cover it. This harmless look was perfect for her unsuspecting customers.

Newton Pulsifer knew he didn't have the best tastes when it came to fashion and jewelry, so he decided to go on the safe side. He proposed, ringless, and brought her to the most expensive jeweler in town so she could pick something she loved. Being a computer engineer paid well, so money wouldn't be an issue. This positively **delighted** his bride-to-be.

His fiancée, who Azirafell now knew as 'Anathema', tried her best to not look disgusted by the piece of jewelry. "It's nice, but it's not really my style."

Azirafell hummed, snapping the little velvet box shut. "And what, pray tell, would that be?"

"Something, uh, I don't know. Simple! The rock shouldn't be too big." She explained. Anathema hadn't grown up with much, and though part of her loved the fact that she'd never have to worry about money again, her other half was still adjusting to that fact.

The demon grinned. "Interesting. I've never had a bride ask for a **smaller** stone. Follow me, then. We have more simplified options in this display." She made her way over to the next display case and flicked the little switch underneath, which turned on several lights to make the rings look even shinier than before.

Anathema was impressed, but tried to not make it so obvious. She cleared her throat and kept her gaze on the jewelry. "May I see this one?" She asked, pointing to a small teardrop-cut diamond on a silver band. It was about two times smaller than the one the blonde had been flaunting before.

Azirafell slid it on her finger. "Ooh, perfect fit." Cooed the demon.

Anathema couldn't hold back a tiny smile. "What do you think, Newt?"

Her man joined her at the display case and inspected the ring. He gave a nod. "It looks nice. More 'you' than the first."

"It is, isn't it?" She said, moving her hand to look at it from several angles.

Just then, the bell over the front door signaled the arrival of another potential customer, grabbing Azirafell's attention. And then she noticed who it was, and got a bit excited. She turned towards the happy couple. "I've got all day, so take all the time you need. If you need me, I'll be talking to the redhead in the white romper with sunflowers on it."

"Thank you, Ms. Fell." Said Newt with a smile.

The redhead in question was tall, skinny, totally covered in freckles and had a small, golden tattoo of a bird footprint on the inside of her left wrist. People would always assume it was a duck's, but they were actually a puffin's footprint. She had been pretending to browse the wall displays near the entrance until she felt the demon's presence behind her. She turned and gave a warm smile. "Hello, gorgeous. How's your day been?"

Antoni J. Crowley, known as the Seraph Jamiel among her angelic siblings, was the local angel stationed on Earth. The full name was for her human alias. She rather enjoyed it when humans called her 'Antoni', but preferred to go by just 'Crowley' when it came to Azirafell, as she was the one who had come up with the last name in the first place. She also just happened to be Azirafell's wife.

Azirafell adored whenever she'd pop in for a visit during working hours. "Decent, but it just got better, now that you're here. I thought you would be busy all day with that food-drive." She had glanced at the clock. It wasn't even lunch time yet and, somehow, they had managed to hand out over 100 crates to needy families and individuals.

The redhead feigned surprise. "I did too but, miraculously, it was organized extremely well and everyone left with even more than they expected to."

"Your doing, I'm sure." Whispered the demon, smirking all the while.

"Well, I suppose my organizational skills **are** rather impressive enough to pull off such a feat."

Azirafell rolled her eyes. "You brag a lot for an angel, you know."

"If you think **that's** a lot, I'll have to record a meeting with Gabriel next time I'm Up There. He's insufferable!"

"I'll take your word for it, no evidence required. So, are we still on for dinner tonight?"

Suddenly, Crowley's expression turned serious. "Actually, I was hoping we could make it lunch instead of dinner. There's something important we need to discuss. Actually, it should be in private. I can cook for you, if you'd like."

The blonde noticed the change immediately. "Of course, puffin. Let me just finalize this sale and I'm all yours."

Azirafell snapped her fingers behind her back and Newt and Anathema's demeanors shifted dramatically.

"Ms. Fell this ring is absolutely gorgeous!" Exclaimed the dark-haired woman.

Newt was nodding. "Yes, it's perfect, we'll take it!"

"Music to my ears! Would you like a box or will you be wearing it out?"

The bride-to-be beamed at her hand. "I'm fine like this. Newt, pay the woman." He did as told and they walked out of the shop in the same trance.

With that, Azirafell snapped all the lights off and locked the back door. She offered her arm to the tall seraph.

"Let's get going, puffin." Said Azirafell.

Crowley took it and they left.

~~~~~

The pair made it across the street, to Crowley's flat. Really, how Heaven and Hell hadn't noticed they lived so close was beyond them. Not to mention, the fact about them being married!

Azirafell observed her angel from the counter. Whenever Crowley offered to cook but didn't say a word about her day, Azirafell knew something was wrong. "You've been quiet. No cheerful stories about the food-drive?"

"I'm afraid I wasn't paying much attention." She said as she prepared the sushi rolls.

The chubby blonde hit the counter with her palm. "Right, that's it. You not sharing something sweet and fulfilling? Whatever it is you want to talk about is bad. Forget the food, tell me what's wrong." She said as she walked over and took the half-made rolls from her hands. She guided her to the nearest stool of the island counter and encouraged her to sit down. The demon even poured her a glass of water and urged her to drink.

After a few sips, Crowley took a deep breath and began explaining herself. "Gabriel and Michael popped in for a check-up. Or, so I thought... Azirafell, they told me your side is expected to deliver the Antichrist soon..."

"What?" Asked the demon, hoping she had misheard her.

Sadly, Crowley's sad expression didn't give her any faith. "Looks like we'll only have another decade together..."

Panic and anger surged through Azirafell's entire being. "Over my dead body!"

"Az-"

She was pacing now. "No, I'm not having it! I'm not going to lose you!"

"...Is it too late for me to Fall? We wouldn't have to be separated then..." Said the angel softly.

Azirafell stopped dead in her tracks when she heard that. She had been in the living room, so she marched back into the kitchen and gently placed her hands on the angel's face. "Antoni Jamiel Crowley, I never want to hear those words come out of your mouth again." Her voice was stern, but gentle.

"I'm sorry, love. Just..." She couldn't hold it in anymore and started crying. Azirafell engulfed her in a tight hug. She kissed her hair and tried to soothe her by swaying in place. That's when it all began to sink in.

The world was going to end. There was going to be another Great War. She would have to fight her wife. Or try to keep her safe while her side tried to fight her. Maybe they could run away from the war altogether, live amongst the stars. Crowley had made several nebulas, it would make perfect sense that she knew how to navigate through space with ease. Surely, she of all people would know of a spot where they couldn't be found.

Crowley had stopped sobbing in her arms and Azirafell carded her fingers through that fiery, red hair. "I'm sorry. Didn't mean to lose my cool." Said the seraph in a voice smaller than a mouse.

"Oh hush, puffin. It was an understandable reaction... Don't worry, I'm sure we'll think of something to make it through all this."

The angel sighed. "And how do you guarantee that, my evil little reptile?"

"Because the world will end if we don't, and I'd rather that not happen. I'm not sure if you've noticed, but I've grown quite attached to Earth, our life here and its inhabitants." She kissed her temple. " **Especially** our life here."

Crowley smiled glumly. "Is it funny or sad that the demon is being more optimistic than the angel?"

"We can say it's a bit of both." Said the blonde, in hopes it would get a laugh. It failed, so she continued. "Why don't we order takeout, focus on each other for the rest of the day and start planning for Armageddon tomorrow?"

The golden-eyed angel blinked away more forming tears and nodded.

"Right, then. Let's wash up and find something distracting to watch."

They tried to relax as much as possible. It didn't last very long, but eventually Azirafell slipped a little sloth miracle Crowley's way. The angel glared at her wife before falling asleep. With a kiss, Azirafell left the bedroom and went to the office. She stayed there until sunrise, when she was surprised by Crowley's shadow looming over her.

"What are you up to?"

"Trying to map out all our options."

Crowley wrapped her arms around her neck and leaned into her. "And what have you got so far?"

"Until I get contacted by Head Office and get more information, we are **fucked**."

~~~~~

As luck, or perhaps fate, would have it: Azirafell would have a special guest waiting for her in her shop the following day. She found them in the back room, sitting on top of her polishing station.

"Azzzirafell."

With a gasp, the blonde dropped her keys and turned on the lights. "Lord Beelzebub! To what do I owe the displeasure?"

"It izzz time." They said with a grin.

Azirafell knelt to pick up the keys and then stuffed them into her jacket's pocket. "...For what?" She asked, getting closer.

"For the end." Said Beelzebub simply.

"As in: the big one?"

They nodded. "Yezzz. Armageddon. And you have a very zzzpecial role in zzzetting it in motion."

"And what might that be, my lord?"

The short demon hopped down from the polishing station. "You will be keeping an eye on the child for uzzz. Making zzzure it growzzz up like a proper little devil."

Azirafell tried not to cringe at the usage of 'it' rather than 'he' or 'the child' again. She made her best smirk and pretended to be excited about this whole thing.

"I will do as you tell me to, Lord Beelzebub. Just say the word." Said Azirafell with a curt nod.

Beelzebub then started pacing around the back room while they explained. "Azzz you know, the American ambazzzador and hizzz wife are expecting a child. That child will be zzzwapped with our Mazzzter'z and they will raizzze the boy azzz their own. And zzzeeing azzz you are clozzze to the couple, you will have no problem infiltrating their family and influenzzzing him..."

Azirafell had sold an engagement ring to Thaddeus Dowling for his then-girlfriend, Harriet. Since she absolutely loved it and said 'yes' to his proposal, the ambassador decided to make Azirafell the family jeweler. Whatever special event they were going to, he'd commission Azirafell or get some pieces for Harriet from her shop. They even ended up being friends thanks to this, hence why Beelzebub chose her in the first place. She was already in the inner circle, no one would find it strange if she was around. Hell, they practically treated her like family already, no one would bat an eye at it!

Beelzebub snapped their fingers and a file appeared in their hand. They handed it over. "All the information izzz in here. I truzzzt you can get yourzzzelf invited to the birth or their home afterwardzzz, yezzz?"

Azirafell nodded. "Yes, of course." She said, taking the file. With that, Beelzebub transformed into a swarm of flies which disappeared into the floor.

Finally, alone, Azirafell breathed a sigh of relief and threw the file atop her desk. She opened it and started going through it. The swap was scheduled for next Friday night. Rather than the military base in Tadfield, it would happen in a nearby birthing hospital called St. Beryl's. The chattering order of satanic nuns were in charge of the actual swap, so if Azirafell were to tag along, she would have to let them know beforehand to avoid any misunderstandings or mix ups.

With one short phone call, she is able to convince Harriet that she'd make a perfect birthing partner, since Thaddeus is out of the country and won't be back for several weeks.

~~~~~

The day came, everything went down as planned. One of the dukes had delivered the child and Azirafell even oversaw the swap herself. There was another family there that day, but other than one passing moment at the entrance, they didn't interact with each other. They also had a healthy young boy. As for the Dowling's boy, Warlock, he truly didn't look like his father and the demon was grateful for that. She had never got on with Lucifer, and turning into Satan only made her more uncomfortable. Though, perhaps that was intentional. After all, no demon should **truly** be comfortable around the king of Hell.

To Harriet, though, she was the furthest thing from a demon. The woman thanked her a million times, from her very first contraction, to when she was dozing off, with her newborn baby boy on her chest. Azirafell went home with the pair to get them settled nicely. She felt pleased and guilty at the same time about her work. It was clearly sketched on her face a few days later, when she returned to her wife, because Crowley quickly started asking questions.

"Did something other than the delivery happen?"

Azirafell nodded, taking a seat on the couch. "As a matter of fact, yes... Harriet asked me to be Warlock's godmother."

Crowley sat next to her. "And you said...?"

"I accepted. This is just what Beelzebub wanted me to do. As far as Head Office is concerned, I'm being the perfect agent." Said the demon in the most unenthused voice Crowley had ever heard.

"Your tone suggests otherwise."

"Well, I'm sure they wouldn't like me committing treason." Said Azirafell, trying to lighten the mood.

"Do you have a plan?"

The chubbier entity nodded. "Yes. I want to show you something."

She reached for her bag and pulled out one of several notebooks. She flipped through the pages, almost frantically, until she found what she was looking for. She folded it open and showed it to Crowley. The angel observed the drawings intently. There were scribbles on the corners of the paper, Azirafell's usual way of making notes for her final designs when it came to jewelry.

The sketches were for a bracelet and a choker necklace. A matching pair, in fact. The necklace was princess-style, a flat-mariner type of chain, six triangle-cut gems. The bracelet had the same chain, but the gems were not hanging like they would've on a charm bracelet. They were hooked from both the base and tip of the triangle-shaped gems, making sure they were steady, rather than loose.

Since Crowley had said nothing, Azirafell started talking. "Haven't decided on the colors yet. Figured I should ask you first. Make sure you would actually wear the necklace."

"This looks lovely but, the Antichrist has been born and you're worried about making me jewelry? Azirafell, I think we need to switch up your priorities for a moment."

The demon chuckled. "It's part of the plan, don't worry."

"Really? Because it doesn't **seem** like it."

"These will conceal our angelic and demonic auras. With Harriet asking me to be Warlock's godmother, an idea popped into my head." Explained the blonde.

Crowley seemed confused, but intrigued. "Go on..."

Azirafell continued. "Harriet said she'd like to be alone with the child for the first few days. But she mentioned needing a nanny soon, even if she starts working from home. Your human alias has no job. You like kids. You can be the child's nanny."

"How would **me** being the boy's babysitter help **us**?"

"If we **both** influence Warlock, he might just be normal, like a human! If he's normal, no Armageddon!"

The angel's eyebrows shot up into her hair, eyes wide. "...Do you really think it could work?"

"It's our only chance. We have to try."

"Alright... How does this relate to being godmother?"

" **Godmothers**. A little miracle convinced Harriet that we'd **both** make excellent godmothers for Warlock. Now, being at the Dowling household isn't like our home here. There is a very good chance that we'll get be seen together by our respective Head Offices. Seeing as they don't know who we are, we have an opportunity to hide in plain sight. If either side asks, we're influencing the boy in our favor, and the human wife is just so the family would confide in us more." Explained the demon.

Crowley raised her hand. "I'm sorry, 'human'?"

"That's what these are for." Said Azirafell, pointing to her drawings. "They'll be enchanted. To any occult being, you'll just smell like an ordinary human, and your angelic brethren would never suspect I was a demon."

The freckled angel was very impressed. "Since when can you make enchanted jewelry?"

"A few millennia ago, actually. I was in charge of the Occult Objects Department for a while, my dear. I wasn't going to be there and learn nothing." She reminded her.

Memories flooded Crowley's mind. "Ahhh, right. Your little break from Earth after the library of Alexandria burned down."

"Yes. So tell me, what colors would you like? I promise I'll use actual metals and gems for these." Asked Azirafell, trying to steer her back to their original conversation.

That teasing grin the angel wore so well made an appearance. "Ooh, the really expensive stuff? Aren't I special?"

"You are. The most special. My special little seraph." Said the demon as she grabbed Crowley's left hand. It was a habit of hers to touch the angel's ring.

Despite the fact that Azirafell was a very talented demon, all her pieces varied when it came to style. This went for both aesthetics and materials. She was known for making rings out of colored glass, cheap metals, bottle caps, etc., but never for Crowley. The ring she wore as a symbol of their marriage was actually the first time that Azirafell worked with real gold herself, no miracles. There was still one bit of the band thicker than the rest of the ring.

It hadn't originated as a proposal.

_"You can keep it, if you want. You know I won't waste gold on humans. Plus, it suits your white and gold ensemble." She had said, in hopes that her keeping something made by her hands would be a sign that she had a chance. The angel had agreed, though Azirafell thought it might've been because of pity, that wasn't the case. Crowley had been pining for just as long as she had, so a gift from the demon, in **any** capacity, was well received. It was millennia later, 1800 to be precise, that their true feelings were confessed._

_Azirafell had just opened her jewelry store, and after a good few hours of dealing with the local sexists, the demon had gotten a surprise visit from Crowley. She had brought some flowers, chocolates and a bottle of wine. They locked themselves in the back room of the shop and began toasting to Azirafell's success. After a fair amount of drinking and sweets, Crowley became fixated with her left hand. Specifically, the golden band on her ring finger._

_"Y'know, it's funny. Everyone always assumes I'm married because of this."_

_The demon had laughed. "I'd love to see their faces once you tell them a woman gave it to you."_

_"I'm sure they'd pop a vein or two."_

_"As if having a wife would be the worst thing in all of existence."_

_"It'd be the best thing, really... For me, anyway." Said the angel, hopeful._

_Azirafell saw her chance. "It would be. For me too, I mean. Well, only if-" She cleared her throat to continue, but the angel cut her off._

_"If what?" Crowley looked at her, eyes pleading for the same thing she's yearned for._

_"If it was you." Said Azirafell._

_But doubt has always been a bitch, and it made its presence known when the demon's alcohol-laced breath danced around Crowley's nose. "Do you really mean that? Or is it the wine talking?"_

_"Let's sober up." Said the blonde. It wasn't a suggestion. She needed to prove that this **wasn't** down to circumstance._

_They did, and once she felt her head completely cleared, she lunged forward and kissed Crowley. The angel was shocked at first, but she didn't dare pull away. She kissed back fiercely, despite having no prior experience. It was a bit sloppy. To the point where she ended up on top of Azirafell because she got a bit too excited. **That** caused the demon to pull away and stare up at her._

_"Where did **that** come from?" She may have been sober, but that had almost gotten her intoxicated all over again. And she liked it._

_Crowley bit her lip, almost ashamed to admit it. "From several thousands years of pining over you."_

_Suddenly, Azirafell didn't feel so foolish. "Wait, you too?!"_

_"From the moment I met you." Confessed the seraphim._

_The demon kissed her again. "I meant it, you know. The ring. Being my wife. This isn't about a demon tempting an angel. I want to be yours." She said, against her lips._

_"Let me be yours and we have a deal." Said Crowley, pulling her closer and locking lips again._

That day, they promised to take care of each other, and they thought of it every time they sat on the demon's old couch or looked at the angel's lopsided ring. Azirafell brought Crowley's hand up to her face and she kissed her palm. "Why won't you let me make you another one?"

"You could, but that doesn't mean I'd stop wearing this one. It means too much to me." Said the angel, snuggling closer to her wife.

They continued discussing the aesthetic of the pieces Azirafell would create and their plan for the next 11 years. It was a very long and tiring conversation.

~~~~~

Harriet and the staff welcomed Azirafell and Crowley with open arms at the Dowling household. The place was huge, with a big backyard, a pool and a guesthouse that could easily be considered upper-middle-class home. Had they not been married, they probably would have just gotten some rooms in the main house and gotten less privacy than they were used to. Their new pseudo-home was cozier than expected. How Crowley was supposed to get up for work as a nanny when their new bed was like sleeping on a little piece of Heaven? And she of all people would know how good that felt. And as much as she loved to let her wife indulge in a bit of sloth, Azirafell reminded her that they had things to do.

While his mother's day began at 8:00 sharp, Warlock's day started whenever the hell he felt like it. Rather than a standard baby monitor, Harriet had bought three walkie-talkies. She kept one in the nursery, one with her at all times, and Crowley had the third. This way, they could communicate, see who was closer to the child and could tend to him faster. Not the dynamic the angel expected, but she was glad Harriet actually cared about her child, unlike other rich people she had encountered in the past.

Azirafell's erratic opening hours meant she was at the Dowling house more often than not and helped Crowley with Warlock. Or, perhaps 'giving moral support' would be a better word for it. Azirafell didn't have the same finesse for dealing with children that her wife had. Her profession also would make it difficult to work in proximity to Warlock once he started crawling and walking, what with all the small objects being everywhere and toddlers having a tendency to put everything they find into their mouths. But they would cross that bridge when they go to it. For now, she simply watched how sweet Crowley was with Warlock. It was unclear whether the baby was so calm due to her angelic nature or simply because he felt safe with Crowley.

Weeks later, Thaddeus returned home and began spending time with his new child and his friend. The ambassador grinned as he tickled Warlock and he squealed with joy.

He kissed the boy's temple, then looked at Azirafell. "So, how have you and Antoni adjusted to living here? Well, I hope."

"Oh, it was an easier transition than expected." She said honestly.

"Really? I'm glad."

The blonde nodded and continued. "And **this** little ball of a baby has definitely made it interesting." She said, giving his tiny nose a poke. Warlock giggled at that.

"I can imagine. You like to keep everyone busy, don't ya, sport?"

"Indeed, he does." Said Crowley as she walked into the den with a pitcher of lemonade and a few glasses. "He loves to eat at 3:00 am. Dead time. One might say he's a little demon." Said the angelic cheekily as she set down the tray, earning a look from her wife.

Meanwhile, Thaddeus simply let out a hearty laugh. "Then he'd be just like his papa! I've always been a bit of a night-owl."

"Unless drinking is involved, then you call it a night quite early." Commented Azirafell as she poured everyone a glass of lemonade.

This time both Thaddeus and Crowley laughed. "Really, love. That's not fair. No one can keep up with your drinking. Not even me!" She said into her glass.

Thaddeus nodded emphatically. "True. I don't know how you do it. It's like it doesn't even affect you!"

"It's a talent." Said the demon, almost proud.

The man downed his lemonade and eased back into the couch, cradling his son closer to his chest. "So, can I ask you two something personal?"

Azirafell knew that tone. "What's on your mind, Thad?"

"How long have you two been married?" He asked softly.

Crowley looked at Azirafell, reaching for her hand. "A very long time."

He nodded, his thumb absentmindedly caressing Warlock's hair. "I know, but, well. You guys just make it seem so easy! You look just as in love as the first time I saw you two together."

"We are. What about it?" Asked the demon.

"Got any advice for me and Harriet?"

Azirafell narrowed her eyes. "I thought you said your marriage was fine just a few days ago."

"It is. For now. But all my other friends say the same thing, 'once you've been together for so many years and kids come into the picture, the romance and love just dies down'. Not to mention I'm always gone because of my job. Really, what's the point of having an ambassador in the U.K. if I'm mostly in the states?!" He caught himself before his voice got too loud, for Warlock's sake.

Even so, the wives noticed how concerned he was. He was scared. Frustrated. Not exactly what he should be feeling while bonding with his new son. Though, the fact that he worried did warm Crowley's heart.

Thaddeus was one of the few who went into politics to make the world better, not to get himself ahead. So far, he had managed to keep his integrity, both moral and professional. Though he didn't know it, the arrival of his 'son' might make his efforts go to waste. This was just another reason for Azirafell and Crowley to put a stop to Armageddon. Or at the very least try.

At this very moment, though? Marriage advice would have to suffice.

Azirafell took another sip of her drink. "Well, we can't speak for the part about children, but being attentive is important."

"Even when you're far away." Added Crowley as she sat next to the demon.

The blonde draped her legs over the angel's lap. "Keep communication open."

"Even when you're upset." Said the redhead as she gently squeezed Azirafell's ankle.

The demon's fingers found their way into Crowley's hair and she started playing with the fiery curls. The action made the angel look at her. "And remind her constantly that you love her. Even if you think it's dumb. That she's already aware and you see no point in saying it so often. Let her know either way."

Crowley nodded, looking utterly besotted. "And show her." Though, they both turned towards him before they completely forgot themselves and jumped each other.

Thaddeus smiled at their happiness. "I'll keep that in mind. Thank you. Can I ask something else?"

"Shoot." Said Crowley.

"Do you think you could make me a set like the one you two are wearing? I think Harriet would love it." Thaddeus was referring to the special bracelet and necklace Azirafell had designed for their mission. The blonde was wearing it as an anklet and he had noticed it when she had put her feet up.

The demon nodded. "I could, but they'd have to be different colors and shapes. Gold and emerald is our combination." That was a lie. She just didn't want anyone else wearing an exact replica of something she had made specifically for her and her wife. "I know Harriet loves a good asscher-cut, though. How does a gold chain with sapphires sound?"

"Sounds perfect. I'll write you a check later." He said excitedly.

Azirafell waved him off. "Don't worry about it. Consider it a 'thank you' for letting us stay here, rent free."

"Whatever you say, Zira." He said, pleased. He then looked at his baby boy, sleeping soundly against his chest. "No wonder he hadn't made a sound for so long. I'm gonna go put this little fella to bed. I'll see you two around."

After he left the room, Crowley stared at her wife. To the point where it made Azirafell finally ask.

"What?"

"You not only, basically, accepted a 'thank you' from someone, you didn't take their money!" She whispered-yelled.

Azirafell rolled her eyes. "Oh, relax."

"No, no. Who are you, and what have you done with my wife?" Asked the angel, smirk on her face while playfully poking at her.

The blonde pretended to bite her finger and giggled as she moved further into Crowley's lap, straddling her. "Perhaps you're rubbing off on me a bit too much, puffin. I'm losing my edge."

"From the looks of it, you're trying to gain some of it back through lust." Said Crowley as she looked up into her lover's eyes and placed her hands on her waist.

Azirafell hummed, her fingers dancing over the angel's neck. "Very observant, dearest. Will you be helping me with that or-?"

"Oh, please. When have I **ever** refused to indulge you, my little hedonist? But I refuse to do it here where anyone could walk in on us. Up ya pop, we're going to the guesthouse."

The demon did no such thing. She simply snapped her fingers and the two of them were transported to their bedroom. In the exact same position and completely stripped of clothing. An argument about using a reckless miracle in the main house would be have to happen. But Crowley bit her tongue and decided to leave that for a later time.

_**-7 Years Later-** _

"Nanny, hurry!" Yelled Warlock as he put on his backpack and marched to the front door of Azirafell and Crowley's flat. He was very excited about volunteering today.

Considering wealthy, public figures care about appearances, Crowley thought this could be yet another way for her to influence the boy towards good. Harriet saw nothing wrong with it and Thaddeus even threw a few donations to the charities the angel had mentioned when they spoke about the subject. So the seraph was granted permission to take Warlock to the soup kitchen next to Azirafell's shop. After all, what better place to start than near home? Plus, it would give the demon some time to make the pieces she had promised Thaddeus.

Warlock and Crowley didn't spend too many hours in the soup kitchen, but in the time they were there, the boy showed to be very helpful when it came to pouring drinks for those who came for a meal. Not one drop ended up outside any of the cups he served, he was quite proud. Next, came the secondhand shop a few blocks over. He wasn't a fan of folding clothing, but he liked helping the store manager organize the window displays. Finally, they went to the animal shelter's adoption fair. Easily Warlock's favorite of the bunch. He assisted washing several of the dogs and even helped some of those same dogs find a forever home.

Just as Crowley was about to fetch the boy leave, she was confronted by a familiar face.

"Jamiel, a word."

Crowley froze at the sound of her real name. With a deep breath, she put on her best fake smile and turned around. "Uriel, how are you? Been a while since I've seen you on Earth. Visiting long?"

Uriel made a face. "No more than I need to. I must ask, are you still trying to influence the Antichrist towards the light? We all know it's not going to work." She said with a sideways glance to the child in question as he ran out of sight, chasing a white Pomeranian.

"Well, dear sister, I disagree."

"Lord, you're more delusional than I thought."

Crowley sighed, frustrated. "Look, all I'm saying is: The Almighty hasn't put a stop to my doing this. Which means it's part of the ineffable plan, right?"

"Jamiel, you know you shouldn't speak for Mother unless She says so." Uriel warned.

The redheaded angel raised both her hands in innocence. "I'm simply stating the fact that She would ensure I didn't mess up Her plan... Has She complained about me to you guys or to Metatron?" She asked, intrigued.

A tiny huff left Uriel. "...No."

"Then I'm not overstepping." Concluded Crowley.

"...Why do you insist if you know it won't work?" It almost sounded as if she cared, that time.

Crowley took in a deep breath again to buy her several seconds to think up of an explanation. "It's my way of coping, Uriel... I've been here since the beginning. I've seen humanity go through just about everything. Needless to say, I'm having difficulty accepting the fact that this sweet boy will cause their end..." As she finished, she realized there was some truth to it. After all, she and Azirafell truly don't know if this plan will work.

"Oh Jamiel, you've always been the emotional type." Said Uriel, pity very much evident in her voice.

"Then you know it's best for me to deal with this in my own way, rather than venting to you, right?"

The archangel nodded, not wanting to continue this conversation. "You make a very good point. I'll leave you to it, then. We'll let you know when you have to give your next physical report."

"I'll look forward to it." She lied through her teeth as Uriel disappeared. Finally calm, Crowley went to find Warlock and they went home.

~~~~~

"And you're **sure** you're alright?" Asked Azirafell as she settled into bed that night. The demon knew dealing with her siblings always drained her.

The angel nodded. "I'm fine, love."

"At least she was alone, right? Imagine if they had sent both Gabriel and Sandalphon with her." Said the blonde with a laugh.

Crowley groaned in disgust. "Ugh, I would've discorporated on the spot as soon as one of them started shouting 'you, Antichrist child, leave that hairy beast alone!' when he was chasing a dog."

"And I'm sure that would've confused Warlock quite a bit."

The redhead nodded. "Indeed. So, did you and Harriet have any interesting conversations before we made it back?"

Azirafell lied down with a sigh. "She was complaining about finding a new tutor for Warlock."

"What happened to Mr. Cortese and Mr. Harrison?" Asked Crowley as she smuggled up to Azirafell.

"They're on their honeymoon/vacation for the next few months. Apparently, they hadn't had any time to themselves since getting married and they needed to do something about it. I think they were going to Santorini. Anyway, I told her the boy would be fine if he didn't have classes for the next few months, but she wasn't having it." Explained the blonde.

The skinny angel smirked. "Let me guess: she's been going through resumes for hours."

"Yup. She's been adamant about it."

"If she doesn't find one that meets her standards, I'll do it."

"Really? You as a tutor?" Asked the demon.

Crowley made her best offended face. "Hey! I would be a **great** tutor!"

"What subject? Ineffability 101?" Teased Azirafell.

"Oh come now, I don't talk about it **that** much. Such an exaggerated demon."

The demon rolled her eyes. "Please, puffin. We both know you love my hyperbolic nature."

"Yes, sadly, I do."

~~~~~

Harriet was not satisfied with any of the tutors, so when Crowley suggested she could be Warlock's tutor until Mr. Cortese and Mr. Harrison came back, she jumped at the opportunity. The full sentence hadn't left the angel's lips and Harriet was already asking for a price to put on a check. She rejected the money, as usual. Though, Harriet gave it to Azirafell behind her back because it was easier that way. The blonde took it happily, since she had regretted not taking her husband's check for the necklace and bracelet.

Warlock, as it turned out, **loved** ancient history. According to the boy, Mr. Cortese mainly focused on math and science, while Mr. Harrison stuck to English, art and the most basic bits of history everyone should know. Things like what people ate and what they did for fun thousands of years ago fascinated him. And while Mr. Harrison saw no value in that sort of information, Crowley did. And what luck, that Crowley had lived through basically everything in existence.

The first week went by mainly on anecdotes from several centuries ago and she then asked Azirafell for help on how to divide her time properly. Because of Warlock's affinity for random historical facts, Azirafell's class schedule for Crowley had the usual 1 hour for English, math, art and science (in that order) and the last one was left for historical fawning for the end of the day. Meaning, every class would have enough time and they could spend hours having fun and 'being nerds', according to the demon. Crowley didn't seem to appreciate the word usage from her wife but Warlock seemed to wear it as a badge of honor. Both wives found it very cute. And Harriet was pleased to no end. That's how Crowley became Warlock's permanent history tutor when Mr. Cortese and Mr. Harrison came back.

**_ -2 Years Later- _ **

"He's turning 9, are you sure about this?" Asked Crowley as she looked in the mirror and combed her hair.

Azirafell sat on the edge of the bed, staring at her through the mirror. "He's a capable boy, and what if it works?"

It was Warlock's birthday this weekend, and the wives hadn't gotten him a present. Earlier in the week, Azirafell had a meeting in Hell and was informed that for his eleventh birthday, they would be sending Warlock a hellhound. If there was one thing the demon knew about humans, it was that they loved animals and having pets in general. For someone's sake, both she and Crowley had shifted into their animal forms when Warlock was a baby and he found it immensely entertaining. And adorable.

Point is: it got Azirafell thinking. If the boy already has a pet, there's a chance he'll reject the hellhound. If he rejects the hellhound, Armageddon can't continue. If Armageddon can't continue, she Crowley and humanity survive just a bit longer. Once again, she had to try, rather than doing nothing and allowing the end to come without a fight.

Crowley started braiding her hair. "So, if we do this, what do we get him?"

"A dog. An easy to train dog. One that he'll love to pieces and love him right back. And protect him too."

"Is there any way you can guarantee those things?" She asked while tying the braid.

"If I can't, a quick miracle will take care of it."

Crowley finished dealing with her hair and turned around. "I don't know, love..."

"Let's, at least, pop by the shelter on our way to the shop, see what they have."

"Alright." Agreed the angel, still unsure.

~~~~~

The Friday before Warlock's party, they drove to Soho. In the shelter, the pair saw many dogs, various breeds and sizes. Azirafell was particularly entertained by a grumpy chihuahua which kept pushing a big labrador out of the little bed in the corner of the play pen. But then Crowley saw a little puppy hiding under a blanket. Or rather, the only thing she actually saw from it was the white paw sticking from under the blanket. She asked about it to one of the people working there.

"Oh, that's gotta be Malachite. He hides from others a lot." Said the man, whose name-tag read 'Frankie'.

Crowley hummed. "Shy thing, is he?"

Frankie shook his head. "Scared, more than anything. We rescued him from an abusive prick near Oxford."

Azirafell's ears perked up and she made her way over to them. "Is that right?"

"Sadly, yes. Poor thing is lovely as anything once he gets to know you, but before that? It's tough for him to feel safe around others. The bastard's in jail, so at least he'll never hurt or scare the little guy again." Said Frankie before kneeling down near the blanket. He picked up a corner of the fabric and lifted it up slowly. The lump under the blanket started wiggling as soon as Frankie's face was visible. He smiled and removed the blanket altogether.

He picked up the pup and brought it over to the wives. Malachite was a young pit-bull, 3 months old, at most. He was very small. It was clear his captors had cut his ears and tail, and there were some old, tiny scars visible on his snout. His coat was as white as snow and his eyes were a brilliant shade of green that neither Crowley or Azirafell had seen in a dog before. Cats? That was more likely. Though, the demon was used to seeing it in gems, which explained the pup's name perfectly.

Malachite hadn't noticed either of them, he was too focused on Frankie. He froze as soon as he noticed Crowley and Azirafell. The angel cooed sadly and extended her hand, so he could smell her. The blonde followed suit. He took a hesitant whiff of them both as Frankie softly petted him to keep him calm.

The buzzer up front rang, so Frankie put down the dog and walked away. Azirafell approached him, knelt down slowly and did the same gesture from earlier, letting him smell her. After several minutes, Malachite gave her finger a gentle lick. Azirafell grinned and looked up at Crowley, who was trying her best to not squeal and scare the dog.

"I think we found Warlock's new dog, my dear." Said the blonde, confidently.

Crowley seemed to hesitate. "Azirafell, are you sure about this?"

"Trust me. This dog has been through a lot in his short life. With the love that Warlock is going to show him, there's no doubt in my mind that he'll do **exactly** what we want him to. Especially because he'll **think** we'll hurt him if he doesn't..." She explained.

The angel frowned. "So, you'll use his past pain and suffering to your advantage? Azirafell, that's-"

"Evil? Hate to break it to you, puffin, but you married a literal demon. Being terrible is in the job description." Said Azirafell as she crossed her arms.

They stared at each other silently for a few moments. This certainly wasn't the first time Azirafell reminded her of her nature, and Crowley definitely was aware of it, but it sometimes made her feel bad. Like the demon was warning her that she has made a mistake. Of course, she knew that wasn't the case but still. They only reason this moment was cut short was because Malachite had nudged his snout into Azirafell's shin just as Frankie came back.

"Oh, well, look at you making friends!" He whisper-yelled in excitement, the pup mimicking excitement in body language as he went closer to the man's shoe.

Azirafell straightened herself out and gave her best, charming smile. "We'll be adopting Malachite, dear boy."

Frankie's smile could have lit up the entirety of Soho, but he quickly caught himself. "We've had two other families adopt him but then they bring him back days later because they don't have the patience for him. I need you to be absolutely sure you're up to the task. I can't bare him being abandoned again."

"I assure you, Malachite will be happy and safe with us. Isn't that right, puffin?" Asked the demon, looking into Crowley's eyes from a few feet away.

The angel looked at her wife, then the puppy, and finally, Frankie. "He's going to love his new home." She said as she placed a hand on his shoulder. "I'll be sure to send you pictures of his progress."

With one small miracle, all of Frankie's worries melted away. He fetched the paperwork without another word. Everything in order, they left the shelter with a scared, but hopeful looking Malachite. Azirafell gave a wave of her hand after placing his kennel in the backseat of the Bentley and he was peacefully snoozing away as Crowley drove them all the way to the Dowling household in utter silence.

~~~~~

"Puffin?" Called the demon as she walked into the guesthouse.

Crowley had left her at the main house when they arrived and she took Malachite to theirs. Not just to make sure the boy didn't find out about the dog before his party, but because the angel was upset. Whatever argument may happen between them, it would have to be handled quietly, to not scare the puppy. Speaking of the dog, it sounded like the redheaded seraph was in their bedroom talking to Malachite.

Azirafell made her way over to the door and listened in.

"-And I wouldn't let her hurt you. I promise. No one will do anything harmful to you ever again-"

The demon opened the door and saw her angelic wife sitting with the white puppy in her lap. "Technically, I never said I **would** hurt him. I just said he would **think** we would."

"It still seems so mean. Like you'll make him relive it. I won't let you do that."

"Then it's a good thing I never actually planned on doing that either... Puffin, we just need a few shots of love from you and Warlock will do the rest. And from the looks of it, you've given him plenty already." She said, pointing to the very happy and no-longer-stressed-looking pup.

She sent a glare Azirafell's way as she scratched behind one of Malachite's ear. "I hate when you don't tell me the whole plan. Makes me feel used."

"I'm sorry, but I knew the easiest way to for him to feel comfortable around so many people, so soon, would be because of you. I promise, I'll be more transparent next time."

"I don't want a 'next time'. I want this to be over!... I still can't believe that sweet child is going to end the world."

"He might not."

"You don't know that."

"That's why we're trying... Harriet wants you to help with the designs for the party. She asked me to come get you."

"Why didn't you help?"

"She asked for you. All she needed me for was for food suggestions."

Crowley sighed, moved Malachite off her lap, gave him a kiss on the head and left.

Azirafell looked at the the dog and let out a chuckle. "I think you're taking my spot in the bed tonight, dear boy." She said as she sat on the edge of the mattress. Malachite crawled closer to her and looked up at her with the most adorable expression. The demon sighed and rolled her eyes and patted her lap. "Come on."

He nudged his way under her palm. She went along with it and started petting him. After a while, she placed her thumb in between his eyes. Malachite's eyes shone a bright blue for a moment before returning to their natural green hue. And just like that, he was out again. "Sleep tight."

~~~~~

"What did you do to him?!" Demanded the angel as soon as she came back to the guesthouse and picked up the pup.

Azirafell, who had been snoozing on the couch, awoke after hearing her wife had slammed the front door. "What is it, puffin?"

"What did you do to Malachite?" She repeated, holding out the puppy, who licked Azirafell's nose multiple times.

The demon wiped her nose and sat up. "I may have altered his memories a bit."

Crowley sat and put the dog in her lap. "What did you change?" She asked while inspecting Malachite, as if she wasn't convinced he was the same dog they had adopted a few hours ago. Understandably so, he was too excited and trusting.

"He can't remember the pain he went through. Not one bit. I also made him a lot more eager to please."

Crowley cooed. "Is that why you feel lighter, sweetheart?" She asked the dog. Malachite's whole body was vibrating with joy. Mainly, because he didn't have much of a tail to wag anymore, just a cute, little, stubby butt.

"Thank you." She told Azirafell softly. "I was dreading Warlock accidentally scaring him because he was too excited to play with him."

"That's why I did it. Save myself from hearing all the squealing and the crying. From both of them **and** you." Explained the demon.

Crowley placed a kiss on the demon's temple. "You're still sleeping out here tonight."

"I know, I know. No more using you. Unless you say so."

"When would I **ever** say so?" Said the redhead, like a challenge.

A devious smile creeped onto Azirafell's face before standing up. "I can recall several times when you begged for it in-"

"Shut it! Don't say anything nasty in front of the puppy!"

The demon rolled her eyes. "Good thing we're giving him away tomorrow. Then I can say whatever I want in my own home again. Well, pseudo-home, anyway." She mumbled as she went into the kitchen.

Besides the filter she had to keep in her mouth and sleeping on the couch, the night wasn't that bad. And it was all worth it to see the look on Warlock's face when he was introduced to Malachite.

**_ -2 Years Later- _ **

Azirafell's hypothesis had proven right, so far. Warlock and Malachite were inseparable. The boy and his dog did everything together. One wouldn't go anywhere without the other, it was adorable. Though, they both did worry.

The closer they got to Warlock's 11th birthday, the more they wondered if they had done the right thing. Head Office still hadn't noticed or mentioned anything of it. They saw this as a double-edged sword. What if their bosses actually knew and were waiting until the Antichrist's birthday to get their hands on the traitors? Or if they truly had no idea and finding out once the Great Plan doesn't proceed as expected enrages them into wanting immediate revenge? Needless to say, neither Crowley or Azirafell slept well in the weeks leading up to the party.

The day came, the celebration started and the demon received a message from Beelzebub themself. The hellhound was expected to show up at the Dowling residence at 3:00. If things were to go as planned, the beast finds the boy, the boy names it and The End would only be days away. As far as she was aware, Azirafell was the only demon present at the house, but just to be safe, Crowley would have to be the one to intervene if Warlock didn't send the hound away immediately. If there was any chance at all that they could get away with this, they had to be careful. Especially now, when they were so close to achieving their goal.

Something shifted in the air once the clock stuck 3:00. The strong scent of sulphur and smoke erupted from the nearby woods and with it came a ghoulish looking creature in a black and white coat, with eyes like lava. It looked like it had the body of a Great Dane, but with claws and teeth that could rip your throat out and a head that looked like it belonged on Cerberus. Another way to look at it was that this is what Cerberus looked like as a puppy, without the two extra heads. Either way, it was a terrifying beast which snarled in a way that made you want to run for your life, but the fear it struck inside you planted you firmly in place.

And that's what happened to all the guests at the party. They were all petrified. Some children were screaming, but their legs failed to listen to their brains to get the fuck out of there. Instead, they all watched as the white pit-bull stood in between the boy and the hellhound, growling at the beast. Yes, Malachite was as scared as anything, but his instinct was to protect Warlock nonetheless.

And hell, after 11 years, both Crowley and Azirafell would be lying if they said they wouldn't do whatever it took to protect the boy too. So, their first plan went to shit. Crowley blessed some water from a nearby table and threw it at the hellhound before it could attack Malachite. It dissolved into a puddle of goo and before anyone could ask questions, both Crowley and Azirafell spread their wings, grabbed the boy and his pit-bull and they flew away.

After about 10 minutes of nonstop flying, the two beings landed in the middle of the woods. Once they hit the ground, both Warlock and Malachite looked like they wanted to kiss the ground. The boy even looked a bit nauseous. Whether it was thanks to the flying or his nerves was unclear. Still, he stared silently at the wives trying to make sense of what had just happened. He sat on a nearby boulder, Malachite beside him, as always.

"What **are** you two? What was that **thing**?" He finally asked while petting his dog's head.

Crowley approached the boy. " **That** was a hellhound. I'm an angel, she's a demon."

"And **you're** the Antichrist." Said the blonde as she finished checking their surroundings.

Horror and confusion filled Warlock's face and he stood up. "I'm what?!"

"The son of Satan. Lucifer. The Devil. Whatever you wish to call him, he's your daddy." Said the demon.

Crowley groaned. "Really, love? A bit more finesse, please."

"No time for that, puffin. Give me your necklace, I need to work fast before we get moving again." Demanded Azirafell.

The angel did as told and took this time to explain everything to Warlock. Who they really were. How they met. Why they became involved in his life. The significance of the jewelry which Azirafell was re-enchanting so neither side would be able to track them. Thanks to this change and the cloaking device Warlock naturally had because he was the Antichrist, they'd appear like three normal humans on their HQ radars. They just had to make sure they weren't seen by Heaven or Hell's forces in person.

Once their plan was sorted, they took off again.

~~~~~

The day had turned cloudy and the wives used it to their advantage. Using the clouds as cover from above, they moved as quickly as possible. How both Crowley and Azirafell wished they would've taken the Bentley. They hadn't flown this much since before The Great War. They almost crash landed after several hours. Now in Scotland, judging by the harsh accent and more Gaelic sounding names on road signs, they needed a place to hide. Couldn't risk being out in the dark when demons are so good at lurking. They keep walking until they reach the nearest town.

The village square wasn't too full, and they decided to go to one of the food stands, since Warlock hadn't eaten anything at the party and was starving. Since they still have Malachite with them, Azirafell hung back with the boy and the dog, while the angel went to get them something to eat. Before Crowley approached the line to the closest one, a familiar voice called out from behind her.

"Antoni J. Crowley? What the fuck are you doin' back here?!" There was no way anyone could confuse that accent and tone.

Or the one, which immediately scolded him. "Really, dearie? Is that how you greet an old friend?" Crowley turned, relieved to see that it really was them.

It was William and Tracy Shadwell, the two paranormal enthusiasts which Crowley and Azirafell had met while on their sightseeing trip to all the popular haunted locations in Scotland. Very nice people, they became quick friends and still wrote to each other from time to time. They had each other's numbers, but they weren't too into phone calls. Something about William thinking he had heard a ghost through the line once. Whether that was a joke or not was still a mystery to Crowley, and now wasn't the time to ask.

"So sorry, Antoni, you know how he is. What brings you around? Not planned, I assume, since you didn't mention it." Said Tracy as she got closer and grabbed both her hands.

William patted her back. "By God, it's been 20 years and you haven't aged a bit! The wife of yours keepin' ya young, eh?"

"Where is she? How's she doing? How're you doing?" She asked a millisecond after her husband.

The angel made a tired sound and pointed over her shoulder. "She's right over there. With our godson and his dog."

"Fuckin' hell, she looks the same too! You two immortal or somethin'?" Asked William with a laugh.

Tracy's eyes never left Crowley. "You didn't answer the question, dearie. Are you guys alright? You look a bit pale." She said, genuinely concerned.

Crowley looked over at Azirafell and Warlock and sighed as she turned towards Tracy again. "Honestly? No, not really. Just getting some food, so we can keep moving."

"Are you guys in trouble?" Asked William.

The angel knew she shouldn't have said anything about it. Just a quick 'hello, goodbye' and get the hell out, but the situation finally getting to her. She nodded as her eyes began to tear up. After that, it didn't take long for the couple to drag all of them to their house for a home-cooked meal and a place to sleep.

~~~~~

After dinner, the resident couple showed Warlock and Malachite the TV room, so he could distract himself for a bit, while the adults talked. Azirafell and Crowley came clean to Tracy and William too. Tracy had always suspected there was something supernatural about the wives, but she would have never expected them to be an angel and a demon. She had just assumed they were witches of some sort. Azirafell more than Crowley, according to William. Perhaps they'd make decent ghost hunters after all, if they ever decided to properly dedicate themselves to it.

"What do you think will happen now?" Asked Tracy.

"The fact that we haven't been ambushed yet is promising. Don't know how long it'll last, though." Said Crowley.

William poured them some more tea. "Will they send another hellhound after him? Since you said that's the only way they can track the boy..."

"Maybe. They said they were sending him the 'biggest' for his birthday, not the 'only one'. Hopefully, the biggest one **ate** the rest of them and **that's** how it had gotten so bloody big!" Exclaimed Azirafell.

Tracy furrowed her eyebrows. "Couldn't they just turn any regular dog into a hellhound?"

The demon grunted. "Well, they could, but it'd be more of a mutt. They follow orders well enough, but they're not as evil by nature or good at sensing supernatural stuff. They prefer to make them in Hell from the start. If they have to do that, it could buy us some time." She explained, before downing the scalding drink like it was lukewarm. Unlike Crowley, who didn't seem to be in the mood for tea.

Apparently, because Azirafell had never witnessed it herself, they need plenty of demon flesh for that process. Both to create the hound and to feed it, so it grows quickly. And they'd rather keep killing Eric's duplicates than pulling lesser demons away from their work. After all, reissuing the same body over and over is much easier than reissuing several different ones. Or maybe they just thought it was fun. Whatever the case, the demon really hoped another hound wouldn't be sent and she'd have more time to think of a better plan than just running away forever.

William let out a laugh. "Who knew Satan would be a purebred fanatic?" He joked, in hopes to lighten the mood. The wives knew what he was doing, though it didn't do anything, they grinned at his attempt before Tracy changed the subject.

"You two should rest. Even if you can't sleep, all of you need, at least, a few hours to relax." She told them.

Azirafell scoffed and drank her wife's discarded drink. "Relaxing while all of Heaven and Hell are looking to wipe you out of existence? I **wish** that were possible, mate!"

Tracy nodded and took the cup from her hands. "Okay. **Try** to relax, then. It's late, and that boy needs you. Even if it's just to be near him in the calm before the storm."

The wives looked at each other, knowing she was right. So they went to the TV room, only to find that Warlock and Malachite had fallen asleep on the couch. Azirafell turned off the television and pet the dog, to not startle him awake. Once the pooch was up and jumped down from the furniture, Crowley picked up the boy and carried him to the guest room, Malachite right behind them. She placed him in the middle of the bed and the loyal hound cuddled up to him, like Warlock was the big spoon. Even in his sleep, he hugged his dog and it was adorable.

The demon shut the door and sat at the edge of the bed. She watched how Warlock's chest rose and fell as he slept. In the moonlight shining through the window, the seraph saw drying tear tracks going down his face.

She sighed sadly. "You poor thing. I wish I could miracle away your fear and sadness, but it might get us caught... We're going to do all we can so you can go back home, my darling boy." She whispered as her knuckles caressed his hair.

"Will's making a salt circle around the house. He hopes it won't let any other demons get in." Said Azirafell as she walked in and closed the door again.

Crowley frowned. "If an emergency happens, you and Warlock can't escape either."

"Blowing the salt away can break the circle enough for us to get out, don't worry. It's not the first time I'm locked in one of these... How is he?"

"Somehow, he's sleeping peacefully. But it looks like he was crying when he was alone."

"Can't blame him. I want to have a breakdown of my own." Admitted the demon.

"Why don't you?"

Azirafell sighed. "Because we need to focus and that would distract me far too much. It can wait until afterwards."

"We might not have an afterwards. You should get some comfort now, just in case."

"To perish in peace?" She asked with a scoff.

"Worst case scenario, yes."

The blonde shook her head. "It won't come to that, puffin."

"How can you possibly know that?"

"I have faith, dearest." She said simply.

That got a grin out of Crowley. "Not very demonic of you."

"Faith in **us** , Jamiel." While using the full name always let Crowley know when she was upset about something she had said or done, her angelic name was always the quickest way for Azirafell to get Crowley to simply accept whatever she was saying as fact, without argument.

The angel nodded and stood, taking her wife's hands and pressing their foreheads together. "Perhaps it's time I start having faith in us too, hmm?"

Azirafell said nothing and nudged closer to her. Crowley could sense her unrest oozing off her in waves, but the demon still kept it under wraps. If she didn't want to break the dam yet, Crowley wouldn't force her. But she **would** force her to lie down for a bit. She gave her a kiss and guided her to the bed.

Azirafell sat on the edge of the bed closest to the door and Crowley on the one nearest to the window. They were facing each other, as Warlock and Malachite slept peacefully between them. The demon kept watch of the window and the angel did the same for the door. Neither of them slept, but their joined hands over the head of the bed kept them grounded. They weren't truly at ease, but their bodies thanked them for the much-needed downtime.

~~~~~

William was finishing up breakfast just as Crowley stepped out of the room. "Nothing strange happened last night. Shall we consider it a good or bad sign?" He asked, after hearing the angel shut the door.

"No idea." She replied honestly.

He turned off the stove and opened the top cabinet. "Will you be eating? You're the first immortal I've ever met, 'fraid I don't know much about your kind."

"I've never been much of an eater, but Azirafell and Warlock will... Where's Tracy?"

William grabbed four plates and started serving himself one. "Getting some things in town. She should be back in a few. How did the boy sleep?"

"He's still out. It felt like his dreams were sad, but not scary. I'll consider that a good sign." She said, looking at the door.

"And your wife?"

Crowley sighed. "Resting her eyes. I doubt she'll relax enough to have a nap, but it's better than nothing."

"And how are **you** holdin' up?"

Finally, the angel looked up at her friend and saw him there, glass of water in hand, almost shoving it into her grasps. With a sigh, she took the glass and sat at the table. She drank the whole thing. Not out of necessity, but because she thought it would give her senses something to distract herself with. Didn't work, but her corporation seemed to appreciate it nonetheless.

"I can't wait for all of this to be over..." She admitted as she sunk into the chair.

William turned his attention back to his plate, while keeping the conversation going. "The chasing or the world itself?"

The seraph shrugged. "Whichever happens first, I suppose... Saddest part is: it's only been a day. If we keep running, what sort of life is that for Warlock?"

"A chaotic one, I'm sure."

"Unstable. Humans **need** stability... What kind of guardian am I if I can't give him that?"

William sat across the table from her. "Well, he's not entirely human, is he? There's a chance he could adapt better than most."

"I hope he doesn't have to."

Just after she said that, Azirafell came out of the room. "What happened to having faith, puffin?"

"Hard to break the habit." Replied the redhead softly.

Minutes passed and Tracy retuned with clothes for the wives and the boy, as well as some tickets for the next train out of town. The angel thanked her, though she insisted this was too much, that they could've gotten them on their own, but the woman of the house was not having it. She cared about them dearly, though she had never met Warlock, she cared for him because she knew how much Crowley and Azirafell loved him. The seraphim began tearing up and the rest had to calm her down, as to not wake up Warlock, so they tried to change the subject somewhat.

Not that it really mattered. Inside, boy was trying to wake himself up properly when he heard the adults talking, and what sounded like a muffled mention of his name, outside the room. His dog was smelling the door too, so, he figured he should see what was going on. He assumed they were having breakfast, considering Malachite's enthusiasm.

"Why the son? Why can't Satan just take over the world himself?" He overheard William say just as he was going to open the door.

A chill went up his spine and he pressed his ear to the wood. "The father keeps track of Hell as the battle goes on and the son deals with the war itself." Explained Azirafell.

Tracy huffed. "Frankly, it sounds like he's a coward. Leaving his only true child, whom he's never met, to fight for him, while he stays in his kingdom? Pathetic!" 

"Someone's always his lamb. The only time he was the first to suffer was in The Fall. And that hadn't been part of his plan. After that, he'd simply make others do his bidding." Continued the demon.

Warlock stepped away from the door and sat at the foot of the bed, hugging his legs. Malachite seemed to sense his sadness and put his chin on top of the young Antichrist's knees. When Warlock made eye contact, the dog licked his nose.

That got a tiny smile out of him and he pet the pit-bull. "Too bad I can't split myself into two, huh, boy? That way we could go back home while the other me takes over the world and makes sure it doesn't actually end." He sighed.

The dog knocked him over, in his own version of a hug, hoping his little human wouldn't feel so sad anymore. It didn't do much, but Warlock appreciated it and hugged him back. It took some time, but he eventually came out of the room, as if he had heard nothing. William served him breakfast and Tracy gave the pooch some dog food she had gotten him. Malachite nearly knocked her over in thanks and Warlock apologized profusely. Thankfully, she loved animals, so she didn't mind it.

~~~~~

An hour later, they were being dropped off at the station and hopping into the next train from Dumfries to Ullapool. Or rather, the first one. They had to change trains along the way. And they had to keep the miracles to a minimum, to ensure they weren't being tracked, but had to use them to avoid being recognized and ensuring they weren't considered suspicious because of the dog. After all, Warlock and Malachite's faces were circulating the web ever since they took off. If caught, Azirafell and Crowley would be considered kidnappers in the eyes of the law. Not that they cared about human laws at this very moment.

They had done just over twelve paranoia-filled hours of traveling. Saying they were exhausted and uncomfortable was an understatement. They all did a collective nosedive onto the hotel bed after checking in. Well, all except for Malachite who had been the most comfortable during the trip, sleeping for most of it.

"Never again." Groaned Azirafell, voice muffled by the mattress.

The redhead nodded into the sheets. "It was a nice gesture and I'm grateful to her, but we really should've chanced it and turned them into plane tickets." Agreed the angel.

Warlock lifted his head. "How long are we going to stay here?"

"A few nights. We rest, get our bearings, then we keep moving. We'll hop on a ferry, get to Stornoway. Old business partner still lives there, I can guilt-trip him into letting us stay. Or blackmail him, whatever leaves my mouth first." Explained the demon.

Crowley was too tired to scold her wife and said nothing, though, she wasn't fully on board with her methods **at all**.

The trio ordered room service and called it a night shortly after. They slept just as they had before, Warlock and Malachite in the middle and the wives watching each other's backs. This time, the angel watched the window and the demon watched the door.

~~~~~

Although Warlock managed to rest, his sleep wasn't peaceful. He kept dreaming of being alone in an old palace of some kind, surrounded by disembodied voices, whispering into his ears. The first few nights, he chalked it up to being on the road for so long the second day. After all, it was Scotland, old castles are very much present all over the country. But after a while, the dreams became a bit more ominous. The voices were inside his head now, they'd wake him up sometimes.

This lead to him not wanting to go to sleep and Crowley noticed. When he admitted what was troubling him, she told Azirafell when she returned from taking Malachite out for a morning walk. The demon turned pale upon hearing that information. This wasn't supposed to happen. He never named the hellhound, there shouldn't be **any** voices.

In a panic, they took to the skies just like their first day on the lam. The quartet made it to Stornoway, rattled, but in one piece. Unfortunately, no peace came for them, because as soon as they came within close range of the castle ruins by the shore, Azirafell and Warlock felt an unnatural force pulling them down to the ground. They landed harshly and the boy held his head because he felt like it was going to explode. When he looked up to Crowley and Azirafell, the wives gasped in horror.

Warlock's eyes and ears had started bleeding. Crowley immediately grabbed him and tried to heal him. The surge of angelic powers was immense and sudden, enough to make Azirafell dizzy. Just as Warlock seemed to be feeling some kind of relief, the ground began to shake. The skies got dark as thunder crackled in the distance. Lightning hit the sea and the water level dipped, as if it's going down a drain. With an unholy growl, a crown of humongous horns breached the surface. Attached to this crown they saw Satan rise from The Minch, as the surrounding water boiled. Whether it was from his monstrous form's temperature, or from his anger, no one was quite sure. And one thing was for sure: they didn't want to find out.

Crowley picked up Warlock, Azirafell grabbed Malachite and they ran away as fast as they could, taking refuge in the nearby ruins. The demon looked back and saw the King of Hell walking onto the shore with the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse flanking him. Though human sized, they were still incredibly intimidating, even when standing next to the 100 foot Devil. To say he looked pissed was an understatement. Azirafell had never seen him this upset, not even when the first Rebellion happened.

Lord, how she wished she hadn't looked back. They hid in the old structure, quivering in each other's arms. Suddenly, the boy realized something. The dreams he'd had about the castle corridors were a vision of this very moment. Except, the voices weren't in his head this time, they were Crowley and Azirafell. The demon was talking to herself, while the angel was still trying to heal him. This was how he realized something else.

"It was a trap. They didn't know where I was, but they could hurt me somehow, and they **knew** you'd try to heal me. They tracked your powers because that would be the easiest way to find us." Said the boy with tears in his eyes as he hugged his dog.

Azirafell was now seething. "Fuck's sake, you're right. You probably weren't actually hurt to begin with. It was just an illusion to get us back on the radar."

The earth shook again. " **Come out and bring me the boy.** " Demanded Satan, his voice boomed throughout the halls of the abandoned castle.

Crowley looked at them both, her heart wanting to shatter. "You three go. I'll distract them so you can get a head-start."

"The Hell you will!" Yelled Azirafell.

An argument broke out between the two of them. Not surprising at all, as far was Warlock was concerned. They did this sort of thing all the time. Though, he wasn't sure if this was the first time their lives were on the line. Being chased by Satan? That was **definitely** a first, because they would've had a better plan for getting away if they had gone through this predicament before.

As his thoughts were focused on the wives, one of the voices from his nightmares started speaking to him. 'End them all' they said, over and over and over again. Something within the boy snapped as he saw his godmothers crying when the ground shook again. He hugged his dog tighter, gave him a kiss and stood. "Stay." He whispered before running out of the ruins.

The ground's constant movement made it hard for the boy to keep his balance, but he pushed forward. He tripped numerous times and it got the attention of the Four Horsemen. With supernatural speed, the Horseman of War ran up to Warlock and snatched him up, taking him straight to his father. He whimpered as Satan looked down at him.

" **So, you're my rebellious son? How dare you run away from your only reason for existing?!** "

"I didn't know." He said, muffled into himself, scared to death.

The Devil narrowed his eyes. " **What did you say?** "

"I didn't know!" Yelled the boy, frightened out of his mind.

"Warlock, no!" Yelled Crowley and Azirafell as they were flying towards them. Malachite was running behind them as well.

With a swift movement, Satan's wing created a gust of air that sent the wives spiraling to the ground and they landed with an awful thud.

Azirafell had landed on top of Crowley's right wing and the angel let out a scream. The demon scrambled to get off, to try to heal her somehow, but the Horsemen of Pollution and Famine quickly apprehended them, pinning them under their boots. Just because they could, Pollution stepped on Crowley's injured wing, definitively snapping it. If the first one was a scream, this was a deafening, pain-filled shriek. Azirafell's blood began to boil as she struggled to escape from Famine's grasps, to no avail. Famine kicked her in the face to get her to stop squirming, and now Crowley's tears weren't only because of the pain, but because she couldn't help her wife. By the time Malachite had caught up to everyone, he was being picked up by the Horseman of Death and going limp in his arms.

Warlock stared down at them, tearing up. It hit him all at once. Two of the people he loved the most were helpless, and his pet was now dead. He'd almost certainly never see his parents again, or his friends. All because of him. Because of what he was.

Too distraught to notice what was going on, he only noticed he was slipping from War's hands when his backside landed in Satan's palm. Once he realized where he was, sitting in his father's hand, he wondered why he hadn't burned like the sea had. He came to the conclusion that he wasn't hurt by his scalding skin because he was the Antichrist. Again, what he was made him feel terrible and he broke down.

The Devil tutted. " **Crying for those two and your dog? Pathetic. They really did ruin you, didn't they? No matter. You'll do as I say...** " He said. He snapped using his other hand, and a vicious hellhound manifested into his palm. This time, its coat was all black and it looked more like a pit-bull instead of a Great Dane (which Warlock assumed to be another way to mess with him, or perhaps his satanic father trying to score some brownie points, he wasn't sure). This one wasn't as big as the one which had showed up to his birthday party, but it was easily just as intimidating.

" **Name it, so we can begin.** " He demanded.

Warlock wiped away his tears. "Will that make the voices stop?"

" **Depends. What are the voices telling you now?** " As if he couldn't look any more sinister, Satan grinned.

Warlock shivered. "To 'end them all'."

" **Name the hound. They'll go away once you have your powers. The sooner you get those, the sooner we'll win the war.** "

Warlock inhaled a shaky breath and made eye contact with the hellhound. The red glow sent a chill down his spine until he made up his mind. "Jasper." He named the beast, recalling the very same shade of red as a red jasper stone. Something shifted in the air and writhing himself as he felt that same splitting headache from before, only this time the pain was going through his whole body.

The boy felt like he was on fire, inside and out. His own eyes turned black as he screamed. As his voice became more hoarse, he felt himself become lighter. He was floating. Literally. He was hovering over his father's hand. He stopped screaming as fear rose up in him again.

"How do I stop this?"

" **Think about it stopping. Focus on it, and it shall be.** "

Warlock focused on his body until he brought himself down. He then extended his arm towards the hellhound. The beast began to float and whimper at the feeling of being controlled. The boy almost felt like a superhero from one of his favorite shows, just using his mind to move things much bigger than him. For the first time since this whole disaster started, Warlock felt excited and it showed.

"What else can I do?" He asked with a mad grin.

" **Whatever you desire. Reality will listen to you. Whatever you want is yours.** "

The boy looked at the sea and the waters began to freeze. Once solid, he set himself and the hellhound atop the ice. Jasper sniffed the cold surface and Warlock began to skate on it. He was moving like an Olympic skater, which proved his powers really did allow him to do whatever he wanted, because he had never skated in his life. He messed around with the ice, melting and re-freezing bits of The Minch. Then, he focused on the nearby trees, bending them to his will.

Satan seemed to be growing tired of this, he snapped his fingers and the boy ended up in his hands again. " **You can mess about when the world is mine. Go on, end them all! Give the horsemen their orders!** "

Warlock nodded, looked down to The Four Horsemen, Crowley and Azirafell and smiled. Suddenly, War, Pollution, Famine and Death were on the ground, as if some immense force had knocked them down. They all struggled to move. They appeared to be tied up by something invisible. Silently, he sent Jasper to Crowley and Azirafell's side. The angel and demon flinched as Jasper neared. The dog touched them and the wives lost consciousness.

~~~~~

_Eden truly was a sight to behold. Its walls enclosed the most beautiful greenery in existence. Not even in Heaven had Jamiel seen such lovely plants. At least, they didn't look nearly as nice in the Creations Department before they were placed in the garden. Properly alive and thriving in the earth? Practically made the angel swoon, it was so relaxing. At least, it had been, until Adam and Eve were kicked out of it._

_Jamiel watched from atop the wall as the first humans marched into the desert with her flaming sword. With a sigh, the seraph spread her wings, about to follow them, but was distracted by a black-clad blonde figure walking her way, wings as dark as night. Her eyes looked strange, not at all like her's or the humans'. They had more in common with one of the reptiles she had seen a few days ago around the south side of the garden. Remarkably similar to the mark on her right cheek, actually. The angel assumed that must've been her animal form. Around her neck was a necklace made out of polished river rocks and interweaving vines. Jamiel thought it strange, as she had never seen anything like it. Never seen anyone like **her** before. The seraphim felt her stomach do backflips as she grew nearer._

_"Sure that was a good idea? Giving away your sword?" She asked with a grin._

_Jamiel raised her chin and pouted. "What's it to you, demon?" She asked while trying to keep her composure._

_"It's just strange that an angel would give lesser beings something so powerful. Wouldn't that get you in trouble?"_

_"I'm sure I'll find out..." Said Jamiel with a hint of worry._

_The blonde stared at her, fascinated. "Hmm... Where were you when I was in Heaven? I don't recall meeting such a selfless angel before. How interesting..."_

_The seraph perked up and looked directly at her. "Y'know what I'd find interesting? How **exactly** did you get her to eat from the forbidden fruit? Adam and Eve knew not to and never really showed an interest in it before."_

_"Not until Eve saw me eating from it. She figured it couldn't be so bad if an 'angel' bit into the pear and nothing happened." Chuckled the demon._

_Jamiel sighed. "Yes well, congratulations, um..."_

_"Azirafell." Provided the blonde. "Don't bother introducing yourself, Eve told me all about you, Jamiel." Her eyes felt like they were staring into her soul._

_The redhead tried to ignore that last sentence and plowed through. "Azirafell. Congratulations on making me look like a fool and a failure of an angel. Should've been watching them instead of admiring the plants..." Said the taller being, scolding herself._

_The demon cooed. "Oh, don't feel so bad. I got lucky. I was messing about by the waterfall, wasting time, really. They told me to 'get up there and make some trouble' and I wasn't really feeling it for the first few days." Said Azirafell with a shrug before touching the stones that hung from her neck. "Found these, decided I wanted to keep them. Just as I was threading them, Eve saw me and struck up conversation. Thought I worked with you."_

_"Of course she did. Neither her nor Adam truly know what lying is yet." Mumbled Jamiel._

_Azirafell nodded as she continued to recount her side of the story. "She spoke for a while. I suppose she was excited to have someone else in the garden. Eventually, I picked the juiciest fruit from the tree and tempted her into eating it. Between the two of us, we did the same to Adam. I hid just before The Almighty started scolding them."_

_"That explains why She didn't smite you."_

_"Why haven't you?" Asked the blonde._

_Jamiel blinked. "What?"_

_"You look like a powerful angel. Why don't you smite me? Might put you in The Boss' good books after giving away that sword..."_

_She considered it. She really did. After all, the demon had a point. Maybe it could help her. Then again, she couldn't bring herself to do so. With a sigh, she sat on the wall. "I suppose I'm just bad at being an angel..."_

_"Nah, I don't think it's that. I think it's the opposite..." She flapped her wings as the first drops of water fell from the sky. "You're too good." Said Azirafell as she shielded the angel from the rain._

_Jamiel looked up, jaw hanging open as she observed the demon. Azirafell's gaze was on the horizon, following Adam and Eve as they crossed the desert. The demon was showing her **kindness**. Yes, Jamiel was certain of it now. She was smitten and there was no way she would forget about Azirafell or what she made her feel any time soon. Nor did she want to._

~~~~~

Crowley woke up next to Azirafell in their bedroom at the Dowling estate. She blinked several times before sitting up and checking her wings. They were fine, not a feather out of place and no pain whatsoever. Confused, she looked out the window. Outside, he saw Thaddeus and Harriet by the pool and running around the yard was Warlock with Malachite and another pit-bull, this one black with blue eyes. The angel turns to her wife and places both her hands on the demon's face.

"Azirafell, love. Wake up, please." She said as she released some energy and sent it through her temples.

The blonde's eyes popped open and scanned the area without moving the rest of her body. She hadn't even bothered to make her eyes look more humanoid. "Puffin, what-"

"Do you remember anything from before you passed out?"

Azirafell shook her head. "Last I knew, Warlock sent his new hellhound after us. I thought for sure we were going to die."

Crowley let out a huge sigh of relief. "Thank The Lord. I was worried I was going mad and had imagined the whole thing!"

"Wouldn't be the first time we had a shared delusion." Commented the demon.

"Yes, but the time from 1313 was because of hallucinogenic mushrooms we confused for normal ones, **not** because of the end of the world!... Did you dream of anything?"

The redhead nodded. "Our meeting in the garden. You?"

"Same thing. And when you decided on a human alias. We were much too drunk that night."

"We were, but not the point. We need answers."

Just then, a knock came from the bedroom's door. Azirafell opened it and stepped aside so Warlock and the two dogs could enter.

"How do you feel?" He asked as he hopped onto the bed. His dogs did the same, panting happily as they lied down.

"Absolutely fine, hence the confusion. Warlock, what happened?" Asked Azirafell as she walked away from the door.

The boy told them everything. They hadn't imagined anything, their off-the-grid adventure really **had** happened. Rather than Jasper killing them, Warlock had sent the hellhound to put them to sleep while he handled everything. As soon as they were out, Warlock used his powers to force his father into his human form, summoned War's flaming sword and plunged it into Satan's chest. The King Of Hell fell, cursing his son with his last breath. He made three of the four Horsemen disappear with a simple gesture, with Death being the only one who left of his own accord.

Beelzebub and Gabriel then manifested in front of the boy, confronting him about his actions being too extreme and premature when compared to The Great Plan. When the archangel reached for Crowley, Warlock's eyes turned black and Gabriel felt his body freeze. Beelzebub had done nothing and watched in fear as Warlock made the purple-eyed angel beg for mercy. With Satan gone, he made Beelzebub crown him as the sole ruler of Hell. That being done, the boy proclaimed there would be no war between Heaven and Hell as long as he was alive, and that it God thought otherwise, She was free to smite him down at any time.

With both sides retreating, Warlock focused on Crowley and Azirafell. He healed their injuries and brought Malachite back to life. After a bit more practicing with his powers, he managed to teleport himself, the wives, his dog and his hellhound to the inside of his parents' guesthouse. It took him a full day and night to make the whole world forget about what had happened since his 11th birthday, but he managed it. Only he, Crowley, Azirafell (and Heaven and Hell) knew what had actually gone on.

As far as the rest of the world was concerned, a boy and his dog were never kidnapped from his party. There were no news about the subject at all! The dog which had showed up was a present from his parents, not some evil being to bring with it the end of the world. His trip to Scotland with his godmothers and his pets had been for sightseeing, not because they were hiding from the law, Heaven and Hell. There were no strange weather occurrences in The Minch, no earthquakes, no storms. No one saw the Devil rising up from the sea. Everything had been normal.

Azirafell felt a smile tugging at her lips. "So, that's it then? We pretend like it never happened?"

Warlock nodded. "Basically, yeah."

"And if you're in charge now, shouldn't you be Down There? Y'know, make sure they don't stage a coup?" Asked the angel.

"Way ahead of you, Nanny." Said the boy as he created a mini portal with his hands so they could see into Hell.

In it, the wives could clearly see Warlock sitting on what used to be Satan's throne. He wore a crown of spikes and almost looked like a medieval prince. On either side of the throne sat a huge hellhound with black and white fur and red eyes. They had the stature of the first hellhound they had sent for him and the muscle of the second.

"Half of me stays here, the other makes sure everyone is following orders Downstairs." He then proceeded to explain how he had split himself in two. How he and his other half swap places every few days to make sure one doesn't grow more unhappy than the other. He had briefly tried it without the swapping, but quickly realized the one stuck in Hell could grow bitter and ruin everything. An evil twin situation in real life.

He also split the hellhound's essence in two, calling them Jasper and Garnet. They guarded whichever version was in Hell for that week, and if the version stationed on Earth was in any danger, they could possess his dogs to ensure his safety in both places at once. Speaking of the dogs, Malachite had taken a good liking to his new brother. Kyanite had been a stray who Warlock had seen while in Scotland as they waited for their next train. No one seemed to want or care about him, so giving him a home was no issue. Both canines seemed to be very happy with this arrangement. As was everyone else, even if they didn't know all the facts.

The wives eased onto the bed, 11 years of uncertainty finally fading away. It had worked. Well, whether their plan had actually been successful, or if it was dumb luck, they didn't know, but they weren't about to start asking. They were alive and they were together. That's all that mattered. Even so, they needed a moment to themselves, so Warlock left them alone.

"I told you we'd make it through this, somehow." Said the demon, the grin could be heard in her tone.

Crowley hummed and nodded. "You did. And I should've trusted you more when you said it."

"You should be elated, we're safe! What's bothering you?" Asked the blonde, inching closer to her.

The seraph sighed. "While we were trying to get away... That spike in energy from healing Warlock? There's no doubt in my mind it would've alerted Heaven as well."

"Well, sure. I mean he **did** say Gabriel showed up after-"

"Yes. **After**. About to be killed by Satan and they're nowhere to be seen. I know that I was a traitor but still, we were blood!... I've been a pawn to them this whole time. How pathetic am I?" Her voice was wavering.

"Your siblings are the pathetic ones, puffin. Not you. **Never** you." Insisted the demon as she placed both her hands on Crowley's face.

Tears started to brim those golden eyes. "At least you've always been aware your side didn't care about you, in a personal sense. I actually thought they loved me in their own way. That they saw me as their strange sister but would stand up for me once. Just once! Even if it didn't help at all! I-"

Azirafell pulled her into her arms and Crowley finally broke down. "I'm sorry, my dearest. I wish I could do something to make you feel better... But I stand by what I said. You're not pathetic, Jamiel." She said as she kissed her temples and forehead. They stayed in bed, Azirafell whispering praise and reassurances all the while.

~~~~~

It was a few days before the wives started interacting with everyone else again. Crowley managed to accept that her siblings weren't who she thought they were and she was determined to move on from that. After all, Warlock had saved the world. She and Azirafell had plenty of things they still wanted to do. And lord knows she and her favorite demon needed a break.

So they took one. A long one. Several months of traveling to places they had never been. It was exactly what they needed. And though they worried about leaving Warlock alone for so long with his new responsibilities, once they returned, they realized perhaps their weekly check-ins with the boy may have been too much.

Warlock had gotten the hang of living a normal life and ruling Hell. He was grateful reality listened to him, because he was sure he would've lost his sanity if that hadn't been the case. Another point in his favor was the fact that he had started spending time with children his own age once the school year started. Turns out, Warlock was a much bigger nerd than he had anticipated, he just needed more people to bring it out of him. At least, that's what Eva had told him.

Eva was definitely the leader of the group, always coming up with whatever activity they should do for fun. Brie was the brains of the operation when it came to school work. Wendy was the loud one, who'd get them in trouble for constantly cursing, but she had a heart of gold to combat that sailor's mouth. She was the first to stand up for someone who was getting mistreated. That's actually how they had met Warlock.

He was sitting by himself at lunch one day, and a bully had started making fun of him for that very reason. The boy had ignored him, but the bully started poking him, getting into his personal space and he threatening to hit him if he didn't give him money. Just as Warlock was about to use his powers to stop him, Wendy threw her drink at the bully's head and smacked him with her tray, food included. It was a mess, and she got in trouble, but she made sure to check on Warlock before being hauled to the office. They basically adopted him into their group since that day and no one messed with him again.

Seeing Warlock happy and stable made Azirafell and Crowley's hesitations disappear and they **finally** retired to the South Downs, like they always wanted.


End file.
